Gritty family turns tradition on its head, anoints woman heir in Chambal

BHOPAL: Ceremony to anoint a woman as a head of family seems to be a piece of imagination in the Chambal badlands, better known for gun culture, feudal mindset and machismo. 

But a family in Chambal not only made its daughter-in-law head of the family, but held a religious event to make her an heir a fortnight ago. 

Manju Agarwal, 35, was honoured with the family's pagdi (head gear) 13 days after the death of her husband, amid raucous protests from residents of Ashok Nagar. Vikas Agarwal, 40, husband of Manju and the son of Dr Jagdish Agarwal died on January 16. 

After death of a male member of the family, a ritual is observed in presence of community members and the 'pagdi' is transferred to next in line senior male member as head of the family. But this time, they broke tradition. 

"Some people were furious, but we did what we felt was right for our daughter-in-law. She is like our son," Dr Jagdish Agarwal, father-in-law of Manju told TOI. 

Initially, there were apprehensions and it took a lot of courage to do it. "But in fairness to all, there were people, who rallied behind us. It delivers a message it's high time we changed mindset," he said. 

Harish Agarwal, a retired bureaucrat and uncle of late Vikas, said, "It was akin to 'tajposhi' of medieval times, when the decision-making power is transferred to next living male member. In our case, after my only nephew passed away, relatives gathered and some close relatives wanted to be anointed the heir," Agarwal said. 

"Why should our daughter-in-law who has all responsibilities not be made the heir? The idea stoked protest. But amid all protests, it was decided by our family that 'padgi' should rest on her head. A function was held on January 29 where she was anointed," said Agarwal. The good thing is that those who once put up a stiff resistance to it are now appreciating it, he said.